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I don’t give my heart away easily. I hold back with people. I’ve had it broken by guys, but mostly by too many friends to give all of me to someone. I’ve been burned and disappointed before and I find myself sitting back and observing people more and more. I watch for who they really are. Once I know, I can give myself to them friend or boyfriend. But it’s such a melancholy way to feel about people..

Always appreciate the family you were given. I had a brother taken away from me seven days before I was born and he somehow still left a hole the size of Texas in my heart and soul. I would give anything to have just a day with him. It’s so painful to know that I will never know him. It’s a hole that I will never be able to fill…

It makes me appreciate my family so much. Please never take them for granted.

Harvesting my Soul

I’ve been so behind lately. Lazy. My grades are slipping, instead of studying, I’m watching tv and ignoring my work. Instead of being a good friend and making solid relationships with those friends, I stay at home and keep to myself. I’m not living. I’m just existing.

Tonight I found this verse in Proverbs and it blew my mind:
“He who gathers crops in summer is a prudent son, but he who sleeps during harvest is a graceful son.”
It made me realize that I have been sleeping. That this time in my life, this time right now, is my harvest and I’ve been gaining nothing from it. I need to harvest the crops of my life and flourish from them. I need to LIVE. Not just idly exist.

God’s word is truly poweful and just.

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